I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Pants are for mortals
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
