So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
wat bout pragnant strippers??
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
