I must be too annoying 4 u.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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