am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
