dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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