16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize