Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Randomize
