Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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