I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
