Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize