she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
