Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Randomize