hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize