Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
