Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
