I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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