my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
