i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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