Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize