She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize