Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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