I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
