bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
