So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
