So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
home. puking in laundry basket.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
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