You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Randomize
