No stitches, just platelets and will power
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
