Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
