Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
