Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize