I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
