I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
