ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
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