This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
