Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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