So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize