After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
