new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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