You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize