I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
