The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
