I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
