U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
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