so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
