after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
