How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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