Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
