69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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