My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Randomize
