would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
