She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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